Cell phone customer service "satisfaction"

A couple of weeks ago, the annual 'report card' on cell phone service customer satisfaction rolled out on the Internet. At the time we were preening ourselves, remarking on how smart we were to have left AT & T land a long time ago and made the jump to Verizon. Not only have we been pleased with our coverage and costs, but it just seemed like any interaction we had with the customer service folks always left us with that warm-and-fuzzy feeling, akin to having swallowed a miniature hot water bottle.

Having just got off the phone with Verizon "customer service," may I retract my statement with a heavy dose of the gag reflex.

Between the two of us, we generally can get by with sharing the least amount of minutes that Verizon sells. Occasionally, when things get out of hand in work or family, we have "up" the minutes to the next level. Then, when the heavy use month is over, it's always a simple matter to pick up the phone and request the company "roll us back" to the lower-minute, lower-cost plan. We've done it many times over the years we've been with Verizon. Apparently Verizon has decided folks can have too much of a good thing.

Since our bill date changes out on the 10th of the month, and here we are at the 15th, I suppose it was just too much to expect the Verizon folks to go back and wave their magic billing wand, restoring us to our lower-minute plan effective the 10th. No, my sweet telephone rep tells me, "Not possible." Instead, we get a dose of the reality that things won't change until today, and we'll wind up paying the premium of minutes we'll never use up to day, "pro-rated." So like the "old days," when you couldn't get help at the lower echelon, I asked to speak with a supervisor. Silly me.

Sure, I can speak to a supervisor, and what phone number would I like them to call me back on in the next 24 to 48 hours, sir? Eh? Gone are the days when supervisors are easily reached. If I don't mind sitting on the higher cost plan for another couple of days, maybe we can talk about it when the supervisor gets around to calling me back. Maybe they think a couple of days in the penalty box will take the edge off my grumpiness. Think again. It's just a couple more days for me to really wonder why the heavens I ever signed up for another two years service with these guys.

So much for customer service.